"Surround yourself with people who believe in you, even more than you believe in yourself." When I reflect on this, my partner Dev immediately comes to mind.
We had an "arranged" marriage, where our families introduced us with the intention of exploring if we were a suitable match. I first fell in love with Dev's family, and then with Dev himself. His sister Nirmala's description of him perfectly aligned with what I was looking for in a partner. When Dev visited, we went out for a dinner chaperoned by Nirmala. After that dinner, we shared our decision with our families. We were engaged four days after our meeting. I feel incredibly fortunate to have found my companion and soulmate that evening.
Dev has always supported and encouraged me. For instance, early in our marriage, I was unsure about taking a break to pursue my MBA when I was doing super well in my career. Dev urged me to go for it, saying, "It is better to look back and regret having done something than to look back and regret not having done something." It turned out to be one of the best decisions of my life. Later on, when I considered co-founding Virtualness with Saurabh, Dev again said, "If not now, when? If not you, who?"
Of course, our relationship is about give-and-take. You can ask him about my contributions!
Recently, Debbie Wolter, my career coach challenged me to envision my big bold vision not just for the year, but for the next 50 years. It may sound like a long time, but as Neeraj Sagar, Founder of WisdomCircle, says, "Longevity is increasing. We will live long unless something untoward happens." I've created my 50-year vision deck, starting with a picture of a couple growing old together, followed by a large family and a chocolate lab, and then my career and community aspirations. When my daughters saw it, they remarked, "Mom, the first two slides are so obvious. Do they even need to be stated?" I explained to them that those aspects of the vision are what we must work the hardest to preserve.
I learned about the concept of an 80/80 marriage from relationship coach Kaley Klemp, who wrote a book on the topic. Dev and I keep this framework in mind. Implementing the lessons is an ongoing process :)
Dev, thank you for being my soulmate and companion. Thank you for often being more than a 50-50 parent. Thank you for your sense of humor, love, and spirit of adventure. Thank you for being you! I am thrilled to express my #GratitudeOnChain.
#GOC
